This morning following an emergency drill, witnesses reported that third former Jane Osten ’21 had sent an email in response to the drill’s announcement to the entire school.
“Hi,” the email began, “I may be slightly late in getting to the Ex since I’m coming from Mem Circle, but hopefully it won’t be much more than a couple minutes. Sorry again!” Sources report that despite being angrily confronted by at least four upperclassmen, Osten remains confident about her actions. “I mean, yeah, it was a mistake and I didn’t mean to reply all; the Choate email system is really confusing! I was really polite in the email, and what’s absolutely the most important thing is that the administration knew I’d be 2 minutes late to the drill. I definitely wanted to make sure that all of the appropriate faculty members were informed of my location and actions, and I guess I accidentally added the students on, too.”
At press time, Osten was sighted painstakingly compiling a list of every student and faculty member in the Choate Directory in order to inform them she would be going to the Pratt Health Center for conference period and would be unable to interact with any of them for the next couple blocks.